Dergi Bursa / EKM-KSM-ARLK 2019 / Sayı 55

72 evrensel sanat universal art çok riskli olacağına kanaat getirip Theo’ya hemen gelmesi için haber yolladılar. Vincent Van Gogh, 29 Temmuz 1890 sabahı, kardeşi Theo’nun kollarında öldü, ve Auvers-sur- Oise’a gömüldü. Van Gogh’u özellikle hayatının son iki yılında ciddi şekilde etkilemiş olan akıl hastalığı için bugüne kadar 30’dan fazla teşhis veya olası sebep ileri sürüldü ama en önemli eserleri de bu dönemde geldi. Şizofreni, manik depresyon, frengi, boya zehirlenmesi (soluma veya yutma yoluyla), Ménière hastalığı ve güneş çarpması gibi teşhisler konuldu. Kötü beslenme, aşırı çalışma, uykusuzluk ve alkol düşkünlüğü ise hastalılığının etkilerini arttırdı. Son dönem eserlerinde açıkça görülen sarı renk düşkünlüğü için, Van Gogh’un bolca içtiği absentte bulunan tuyon maddesinin neden olduğu söylendi. Bu madde Van Gogh’un görüşünü bozarak nesneleri sarımtırak renkte görmesine sebep olmuş, bu da ressamın eserlerine yansımıştı. Bir başka teoriye göre ise Van Gogh’a hastalığının tedavisi için yüksek dozlarda yüksük otu verilmişti ve yüksük otunun sarımtırak görüşe veya sarı lekeler görmeye sebep olmuştu. Fakat Van Gogh’un yaptıkları gerçekti, kendisi hayal… Eserlerini izleyenler ona hep hayran kaldılar. Öldüğü yatağının üstünde yatarken “Vicdan, insanın pusulasıdır. Mutluluk... Başarmanın keyfinden, yaratıcı çabanın heyecanından türetiyor. Seçimden değil, kaderden dolayı maceracıyım. Resmimi hayal ediyorum ve sonra hayalimi boyuyorum. İnsanları sevmekten daha sanatsal bir şey olmadığını düşünüyorum. Gecenin çoğunlukla, günden daha canlı ve daha zengince renklendirilmiş olduğunu düşünüyorum. Eserlerime yüreğimi ve ruhumu harcıyorum ve bunu yapınca aklımı kaybettim. Keşke onlar beni olduğum gibi kabul etseler. Ne yazık ki, birisi tecrübe kazandıkça, gençliğini kaybediyor. Aşk zorluklar getirir, o doğru; fakat onun iyi tarafı, enerji verdiğidir. Eğer birisi gerçekten yaşamak isterse çalışmak ve cesaret etmesi gerek. Resimler, ressamların ruhlarından türetilen kendi hayatlarına sahiptir. Bir tek resim boyadığım zaman kendimi canlı hissediyorum. Sarısız ve turuncusuz mavi yoktur. Eğer herhangi bir şeyi denemek için cesaretimiz olmasa hayatımız ne olur? Dine çok büyük ihtiyacım olduğu zaman, dışarıya çıkıp yıldızları boyarım. Mutsuzluğum sonsuza kadar sürer.” relapse and was not allowed to paint for a while after trying to eat his paints, but continued to drawing after recovering. He spent most of his time in his room but could go out for short walks accompanied by his doctor. Limited access to life outside the clinic resulted in a shortage of subject matter and he worked on interpretations of other artist’s paintings, such as Jean-François Millet as well as variations of his earlier work. Suffering from a series of new strokes, Van Gogh was becoming famous in Paris. He was hailed as a “genius” in an article in Mercure de France. Van Gogh left Saint-Rémy for Auvers-sur-Oise near Paris. There, he would live under the supervision of Dr. Paul Gachet who had treated several artists before and also be close to his brother Theo. Van Gogh’s first impression was that Gachet was “iller than I am, it seemed to me, or let’s say just as much.” But he later started to get along well with the doctor and made three different portraits of the doctor. Devoting himself fully to painting during his time at Auvers-sur-Oise, Van Gogh painted 70 oil paintings during a period of about 70 days. In his last letter to his mother and sister, he wrote that he was much calmer and peaceful than the previous year. However, Van Gogh shot himself in the chest at a nearby field. He was able to walk back to his hotel and lay down. Realizing the bleeding, the hotel owner called the town doctor Mazery and Van Gogh’s doctor Gachet. Deciding that it would be too risky to take out the bullet, the doctors sent news to Theo. Vincent Van Gogh passed away in the early hours of July 29, 1890 in his brother Theo’s arms and was buried at Auvers-sur-Oise. Over thirty diagnoses and possible causes have been proposed regarding the mental disease that had a significant impact on Van Gogh especially during the last two years of his life but this was the period when he completed his most important works. The diagnoses were as varied as schizophrenia, manic depression, syphilis, paint poisoning (due to inhalation or swallowing), Ménière disease and sun stroke. His condition was likely worsened by malnutrition, overwork, insomnia and alcohol. It was rumored that his fixation in the color yellow observed clearly in his final works was caused by thuyone, a substance found in absinthe that Van Gogh consumed a lot. Supposedly, this substance disrupted the eyesight of Van Gogh making him see objects in yellowish colors which reflected in his works. According to another theory, Van Gogh was given substantial amounts of foxglove which caused a yellowish eyesight or seeing yellow spots. However, what Van Gogh painted was real but he himself was a dream… Those who viewed his works were all left in awe. Lying on his deathbed “Conscience is the compass of man. Happiness… Stems from the joy of success, excitement of the creative effort. I am not an adventurer by choice but by fate. I dream my painting and I paint my dream. I feel that there is nothing more truly artistic than to love people. I often think that night is more alive and more richly colored than the day. I put my heart and my soul into my work, and have lost my mind in the process. I wish they would only take me as I am. Love always brings difficulties, that is true; but the good side of it is that it gives energy. If one wants to live truly, one needs to work and have courage. Paintings have a life of their own that derives from the painter’s soul. I feel alive only when I paint. There is no blue without yellow and without orange. What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything? When I have a terrible need of – shall I say the word – religion. Then I go out and paint the stars. The sadness will last forever.”